I voted for the first time last week. My husband of eleven years was blown away, he couldn’t imagine an intelligent woman like me had never voted. It was a secret I held on to for over 20 years, no one knew. Why hadn’t I voted? Fear and upbringing mainly. I was taught that my vote didn’t matter but somehow, over time, that translated to I didn’t matter. Not because of how I was raised but because of an accumulation of life events and traumas. If I don’t matter then who am I to have an opinion worth hearing, worth voting for? Who do I think I am?
The fear set in long ago as a child and the pattern of my life had been SILENCE. I resigned my passions, my opinions to the false belief that I didn’t matter. Here’s the rub, I’m not the only one that feels this way, that feels the fear deep down in the depths of their souls. There are others like me acting out of fear.
If I’m writing on this subject I must be healed from my fearful ways, right? Wrong!!! I am aware of them, but I still struggle almost daily. I posted about depression last night and this morning, afterwards I battled with my negative self talk and doubt. Who am I? Who do I think I am? What will they think of me? I may not always let my fear stop me from being transparent about my journey but it still operates in the background, causing me to question how publicly I share my life.
Then a friend reached out to me today. Told me they we proud of me for being transparent about my depression. To continue to be bold. To talk, to show the struggle. “We need a voice…keep voicing for the silent.” Let that sink in for a moment. What a tremendous gift that was given to me. Proof positive that the path I am on is the right one. That my actions have a positive impact and inaction on my part could be devastating.
Whatever you choose to NOT do, let it not be influenced by FEAR. Step out from under the fear and be BOLD. What fearless action you take today could change one person’s life forever. Who knows maybe that one person is YOU.